Friendship is good for the soul

My dog is my best friend. There, I said it. She makes me smile every day and does things that literally have me snorting I laugh so hard. She listens, she makes me happy and she is there for me always. That’s the definition of a friend right?

As a human we all have this basic desire to do things that make us feel good about ourselves. We work all year round for that holiday or we buy a new pair of shoes because they winked at us and made us feel special. We exercise to release feel good endorphins or we have sex to…well…you know 😉

Friends are the beings that leave footprints on your soul and a smile on your face. They love you for you and they do so without judgement or jealousy. For me a life without friends would be a lonely place. My crazy, irrational, emotional, sensitive, geeky self is enhanced by the beings I choose to have around me and call my buddies.

People come and go but these guys, these guys are wedged firmly in my heart.

Have you ever had one of those moments where you meet someone new for the first time and you just know? It takes something so simple like a comment or a common interest or a joke that no one else would think was funny and that’s it – you know you have years ahead of you filled with tequila, spooning and tears. You are going to speak to this person so much about the same shit yet never get bored or you’re going to have no contact with them for years and when you meet again, it’s like you saw them just yesterday.

This person is going to slut drop with you on the dance floor like the best of them, eat that piece of cake when you’ve had your heart broken and help to pick you back up when you make a mistake. They are there when you are at your best and there when you are at your worst and they want nothing in return; they do it just because.

When you have these people in your life you stop thinking that friendship is based on quantity and start to realise that it’s about quality. You feel whole and accepted – you are a part of something that cannot be faked and is not based on what you do or don’t have. You start to understand more about the person you are as you see it mirrored in the friends around you.

Without a shadow of a doubt friendship is such an important thing when it comes to being your best self and we cannot expect to live a positive life if we surround ourselves with negative people. Life is too short to waste on people that bring you down and stepping away from those that do doesn’t make you a bad person, it makes you an honest one.

My friends enhance all of the good qualities I have and help to silence the bad ones. They make me feel lucky and at times, a little big headed because I think to myself “If these amazing people are making an effort to be in my life, does that mean I’m a little bit amazing too?”

It doesn’t matter if you have one or several of these friends in your life; what matters is that you make them feel just as lucky as you do right now…

Who are we to judge?

I think unfortunately it’s in our nature to judge. As a species we are so competitive and constantly strive to be better and there is nothing wrong with that. But does being our best self make as any better than the person next to us? Does eating a sugar free diet make us better than our friend who starts her day off with a croissant and jam? Or does the fact that we run 5 kilometres every day make us better than the stranger we travel past doing a fast walk?

The answer is no.

Being a truly wonderful version of you is not all based on a rocking body that you feel confident in and an attitude to match – it goes so much deeper than that. You aren’t better than someone simply because you have worked for a body you’re proud of or because you haven’t eaten a carbohydrate in 2 years. And your idea of a happy weight or way to eat is more than likely going to be completely different to at least 90% of the rest of the population so why waste your breath judging others around you just because they don’t believe in what you do?

Be proud of what you have achieved and the journey you have taken. Share it with others and be excited that you have found yourself! But beware the fine line of sharing and preaching…

I like to remind myself sometimes that if I could eat ice cream covered with marshmallows and toffee sauce and chocolate sprinkles and caramel wafers…caramel…caramel…caramel………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..where was I? Oh right ice cream! So I like to ask myself, if I could eat ice cream with let’s say (to be on the safe side) a variety of delightful toppings for each meal for the rest of my life and not work out and have the body of a Victoria’s Secret Angel then would I? Uhhhh hell yeah! I mean who wouldn’t right? But the simple fact of the matter is that just won’t work for me and the harsh truth is i’d probably kill myself within a year or turn into a 99 flake. Oh and just so we’re clear I wouldn’t last longer than a day as a 99 flake as either i’d eat myself or the dog would so this is just not an option for me! The point is if we are really honest with ourselves, we would most likely choose the easy way if it were viable in helping us achieve our goals. Only it’s never that simple and if it were, well it wouldn’t be a journey now would it.

So instead we set our goals and we work hard for them, sometimes making sacrifices and doing things that we might not always want to do and yes I get it. I understand the frustration that can arise when you say no to the bread basket or no to that cocktail with your friends because it’s not going to help with your class tomorrow. I appreciate it can be difficult and seem a little unfair and so when we finally hit our goal we may somehow think we are ever so slightly inferior to everyone else. But step down from your pedestal and don’t judge because they’re on their third cosmopolitan of the night – it’s not their journey remember.

Instead be graceful and embrace their choices as you would hope for them to embrace yours because after all, what’s so special about everyone being the same??

Make your journey a positive one by letting go of any negativity and in doing so you’ll make it so much easier for yourself, I promise 🙂